Today I Learned An Important Lesson

Today I learned an important lesson. A lesson about hope and trusting the answers I get from Heavenly Father.

You see the start of this semester has been tricky. We didn't receive any federal financial aid for Stephen's schooling so we had to apply to an outside school loan company to receive aid and it's taken longer then anyone could have expected.

Luckily we had enough in our savings account to pay for this semester of Stephen's tuition. But it hasn't left us with ANY buffer. We are down to pennies left in our name, well to be more accurate a penny. That was OK though, because the financial aid was expected to get here by yesterday so we would have enough money to rent a moving truck and to pay bills that are due.

But as with most financial aid, it did not come when expected...

Also, as I mentioned in previous posts, we are moving...TOMORROW!

So this morning I did what I always do when I need guidance, I got down on my knees and prayed. While I was pleading with the Lord to help me figure out how we were supposed to find enough money to move tomorrow, I got the most overwhelming sense of peace and understanding that everything would be alright, we would have the money to move.

I ended my prayer and started to move through my day with calm. But as the hours moved on, and as Stephen's different endeavors to get the money through other means got more and more desperate, I got more and more concerned that we wouldn't have the money in time.

I started to pray again, more frantically this time, that somehow, some way, we would find the money to move tomorrow. I was gently reminded by the Spirit that I had already gotten an answer and to trust that answer and to have hope.

I ended my prayer and again continued on my day with peace.

A few hours later, Stephen called me to say that the only way we would have the money to move was if we got the financial aid today and that it wasn't likely to come today.

I immediately panicked but then I remembered the answer I had received earlier in the day and then again a few hours previous. I knew we would have the money to move tomorrow. I just had to hope.

Just a few minutes ago Stephen called me to say, that against the odds, our financial aid came today! I immediately started to cry and said a prayer of thanks.

...

Now, this may seem like a small incidence but it taught me an important lesson. A lesson I think the Lord has been trying to teach for awhile now. 

As you know, I have had struggles with fertility and miscarriages for almost 2 years now. You may not know, though, that the Lord has promised me many times that I will bear more children in this life but that I needed to trust and hope in His timing.

And to be completely honest, I have been lagging in the hope department lately. I have been feeling discouraged by the lack of results, i.e. not getting pregnant. 

Stephen, however, has had hope for the both of us. He constantly reminds me of the Lord's promises and the necessity of having hope as we experience this trial.

Today, I have learned that lesson. The need to have hope in trials. The need to listen and trust in answers to prayer.

I guess it's better late then never, right? Maybe I needed a smaller scope example, like when you take a test, if you didn't do the quizzes and homework, the test will be impossible. I needed this smaller trial to understand what I needed to know for a bigger trial.

So today I can rejoice that something finally penetrated this thick skull of mine.